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2003-05-28 ~ 12:03 a.m.
Almost The Caribbean
WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION!!
PART UNO
Alrighty. Here's where we start the good stuff. The first one is a picture of me laying on the bed(s) in our cabin. The way this works is that you get two beds, one against one of two walls, but if you so decide, you can push these beds together.
If you notice on the left corner under the TV is what they call a corner light. Apparently, some people need light in the corner. The large covering of this corner light looks like a picture of the Titanic. Granted, most pictures of ships on the boat reminds one of the Titanic. It's just what we relate it to because we are all neurotic idiots. (I say all because many people and even us thought we were funny and brought up in conversation, Jerry Seinfeld style, "What.....is up.....with all the pictures of the Titanic? Should we be questioning our mortality while we're on vacation?"
The door handle you see on the left is actually the bathroom door. There are magnets where the door would swing open to hold it. Since we were on the ship, if the door wasn't closed or up against the magnet, there was much door swinging until the door was stopped by one of the two.
Also, I will be wearing this particular outfit in all the pictures you will see this entry because I think we were the last passengers to get our luggage.
Ah, yes, here's how luggage works. You give them every piece of tagged luggage you have before you get on the boat. There are these men similar to the guys by the curb at airports that check in your luggage. I suppose that way they don't have 2000 people wandering around with 4000 pieces of luggage. This guy has a list of you and your cabin number, which was handy because we didn't even know what our cabin number was. He also mentioned, "You can take care of the luggage handlers tips right here," which was farg-ing brilliant. I will forever use that. "You can handle my tip right here. Thank you beddy much." They then deliver your luggage in front of your door later.
I wasn't thrilled with the idea since because of airport security you're not really supposed to lock your luggage anymore anyway, but then I realized that we were on a boat. There's a limited amount of space someone would be able to hide stolen goods.
Yes, I know I'm long winded. Bite me. And, in case you missed the last entry, all links will open in new window.
FIRST PIECE OF PICTURE LOVING HERE
This next picture is the view we got from the cabin. It is while we were still in port at Miami. The water looks blue. DO NOT BE FOOLED. It wasn't really that blue. More of a polluted greenness since that's where all the big ships were.
I actually expected a little hole of a window like in the movies. So, yes, we took a picture of it.
This picture is of the rest of the cabin. You can see some of the closet space.
We didn't take a picture of the bathroom which is a shame. Not a shame in the broad term of real shames, but because it was kinda groovy that it was tiled from top to bottom, and the toilet went WHOOSH when you flushed it like it was ready to take anything that came too close to it while it did its own duty of flushing.
The shower was so fulfilling, not usually a word I would use when describing a shower, but it's true. The shower head didn't let the water go too hard or too soft. The stream wasn't too narrow as to only hit little parts of you. And the hot water never ran out. It was Goldilock's proverbial "just right." (tearing up) I may never have a shower that wonderful again. They even put shampoo and shower gel dispensers in there. I didn't use the shampoo, but the shower gel was a delightful, tropical, suntan oil smelling mix.
Also, you may notice sodas and water on the counter there. Though we didn't get a price list, we were wise to the ways of hotels where they try to stick ya for extra soda pop. We later found out that the big water there only cost three dollars, which is actually not that bad in terms of "screwing people for extra money," but they did not prevail. Instead, we bought many of the pictures that they take as debark and, uh, rebark the ship at various ports. (again, which I don't yet have scanned.) Yep, we sure showed them...
And here is picture of the happy couple at the mere beginning of our journey.
While we were standing in line to check in on the boat, we started talking to the couple in front of us. We started talking because this older man in front of them felt the need to talk to everyone. I just figured that he would talk more than anyone of us wanted to hear. Fortunately, he did not, and it gave us a chance to talk to aforementioned couple. They were recently in Vegas, so it gave us something to talk about. They are from Oklahoma. Super nice couple. She was born and raised there, so she said stuff like "That's a hoot." He wasn't born and raised there, so he didn't. We ended up spending quite a bit of time with them and even got them moved to our dinner table.
I think that last picture is when I REALLY started to look like hell that day. I probably don't need to mention what I smelled like.
By this time, I realized how much the wind really picks up that high on a boat. I have a bunch of hair. I had no luggage which held my hair things. I managed to twist it around on a pen. I later went to the beauty salon to get a little "typing" done on my hair to see what hairstyle would be best for me. To get a better idea what to do. Her first statement was "Why would you want to have so much hair?" Then she asked why I had so much breakage in the front of my head. Just so you know, I don't. I've had these little baby hairs annoying the CRAP out of me for as long as I can remember. I don't wear my hair that tight at all. I didn't even blowdry regularly until last year. But then she gave me this look like I was lying. I was just kinda like, "Look, lady, it's not like you're a doctor. I have no real reason to lie about what I do to my hair." I didn't go back. Especially after she said that she would give me a $90 discount on a cut and highlight. No, I didn't even ask what the price would be. I figured if the DISCOUNT is that much, there's no real reason to go any further with that.
This has little to do with this picture except that you get to see the comedy of my hair. This was taken soon after we pulled out of port, which was after we did our safety drill.
The safety drill is when everyone puts on their life jacket, figures out how to wear it and what all the little gadgets on it do, and where our "muster station" is. A muster station is where, in case of emergency, everyone muster go. haha....yeah..sorry. The drill was fine and all, though everyone in our particular muster station was rather quiet and solemn. The guy working the mike on telling us what to do and where to go was a real jackass. He used a bunch of "Sit down and shut up. I don't want to hear anything. You'll want to make jokes, but don't. This is serious. There will be fun and games during your vacation, but this is NOT part of it. We thought this was pretty standard until our new friends told us that their guy was telling jokes while everyone was filing in. Stupid jerk.
This also had little to do with the picture. The picture, again, was soon after we left port around 4PM. 4PM is a pretty standard time for cruise ships to leave, so there is another Carnival ship behind us.
BABY HAIRS, CRUISE SHIPS, SMELLY GIRL ABOUND!
This next picture is now BRE's wallpaper on his computer. Maybe there's a way to make it the wallpaper of our entire office. The water is seriously that blue. It eventually was even darker than this. I will have something to compare the hue to later.
After all I've written so far, I find this next one humorous. This was our last site of Miami.
Holy crap, someone better send me cookies or some crap for all this amusement. Hey, YEAH. I still have friends that owe me birthday presents.
I just find this picture really funny. What is really the focus of this picture? Someone should paint this.
Ah, but another story I can relate. Betrothed, Rally Edition LOVES to take his own picture. I mean, he'll pose with someone. He doesn't just arbitrarily take pictures of himself, but he just loves to take the picture himself. And, when you're not going for background detail, it's a bunch of fun. I've gone through old photo albums of his, and there are tons of pictures of him and someone else, and you can tell it's one of those arm-length pictures. It kinda makes them special somehow. You saw a couple earlier, and here is yet another one, this one just didn't come out quite right because the zoom was, well, zoomed.
This is where we lost sight of all land and other boats. The guy portion of our new friends said that where we lost sight because of the Earth's curvature is 17 miles away. I guess that sounds right. If the information is wrong, let me know. I just like little details like that.
Even though we couldn't really see anything around us, we came to realize that we were never too much more than that 17 miles from help if we needed it. Cruises are fairly popular, and there are many different cruise lines. At night, we could see that one red light from the top of another boat. It was comforting.
This next one is of the pool on the deck of the boat. If you look to the left of the picture, you won't see the big-ass waterslide that was there. I'm not sure why it didn't make the cut of the picture. I guess BRE just found it unnecessary. I dno't try to understand.
Interesting tidbit on the pools and jacuzzis: They use seawater. Every night they drain the pool, and everyday they fill it back up, stick some chlorine in. I guess that's nice since there are many children swimming in it. It makes it smell a little funky though. I mean, seawater is alright, and chlorinated water smells almost fresh, but the two together, well, is kinda like Smirnoff Ice and Kahlua. It's not BAD, but it's not that great either. I only got in the jacuzzi once. I just didn't have time for more.
The funniest tanline I saw (as mine were burns and not tans) was this lady who wasn't particularly fat, but not skinny, and she was bending to get into the jacuzzi. She had a beautiful golden tan except for her where the folds of her ass met her thighs. STARK WHITE. This just seemed like a good place to put that story...
This next one was my first absolute favorite picture of our whole vacation. The male counterparts played a big game of chess. On the upper part of the wall in the middle, you will also see a sign for "Crew Muster Station". This isn't important, really, but now you know what that is.
I told you it was a big game. Har! Yeah, I realize I'm not funny anymore, but as I've mentioned countless times, I amuse me and that is STILL all that really matters.
We didn't take anymore pictures that night, as after dinner (which I was cleaned and better dressed for) we passed the farg out.
We met our waiter, Pedro, and his assistant, Fernando. I, personally, didn't get pictures of them, but the female portion of the other couple did. Not of Pedro, of Fernando. She may send me one of those. I think Pedro did go out of his way to make our dinners suck ass. I think we may have been holding him back from the more important things in his life, like serving the other tables. It was just funky. His other tables seemed to like him just fine, but he was an absolute ass to us. Fernando, though, we liked him. Good man.
So, that was the first day. I'm kinda hoping the rest of the entries don't take as long as this one did, but I will post the rest of my vacation if it takes me until my next vacation.
Cheerio!
OH... speaking of cheerio..... there were a damn lot of people on the boat that were from England or South Africa. Well, from everywhere really. I noticed that folks from South Africa or other English speaking nations (at least with that dialect) around those parts say a lot of "alright?" or "ok?" at the end of their sentences. Like a LOT. Like, "I'm from South Africa, alright? And I will be your masseuse, alright? I'll be giving you a regular deep tissue massage, alright? I'll just need for you to take your bra off, alright? Alright, alright?"
And, yes, we did get massages. We did that couples massage thing where there are two beds in one room. I'm not really sure what the purpose of that is. Not like we could look at each other and make funny faces at each other. But, from the rocking of the boat, I fell asleep so easily. I got quite a bit of sleep the first night, so it wasn't like I needed more rest, and I usually don't fall asleep during massages, but, holy cow, there was a mess of drool on the paper that covered my face-rest.....
Bah.... Leaving now....
I'll try to get Day 2 up fairly quickly...
Ok, cheerio forreal this time..
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