2007-06-15 ~ 2:33 p.m.

Welcome Back To Hoodoo!

So, sit back relax and enjoy another episode of

"-CHris.'s Spiritual Hoodoo Crap!"

This one was to my friend, "S". We have been having small conversations about The Power of Now lately because I had mentioned something about it, and she mentioned that her mom had read it and loved it and was trying to force it down her throat. I am not a force it down your throat type of person (except to ya'll, but you came here by CHOICE, dammit!!!)

The other night through the Power of Beer, we had a conversation that was not necessarily spiritual, but I rocked her world by making an observation about her. I brought her to tears, basically. Not in a mean way, but if you've ever been to therapy, especially group therapy, you learn quickly (if you're not in denial) that people can see things about you that you've spent your entire life covering up. And that is what happened. I told her that she was angry. And she is. And it made her cry because that was something she NEVER expected to come out of my mouth. That really isn't a side of her I've ever seen. But it's certainly something that she's heard a lot of her life from other people.
But, my eyes are partially open, so I can see these things about people that they cover up... at least that's what I like to think. Anyway, in this case, I was correct.

So, the next day, I spent a couple of hours writing her one of my famous letters. I gave it to her and said, I think last night was wonderful because you can finally see, "Wow, there's something that I couldn't see about myself, what other things about am I not seeing?" She agreed, and later called me to tell me that the letter resonated with her. I hope it resonates with you as well.

I replaced her name with "S" and (full name). I used her full name to help drive the point home. Feel free to put in your own name or make one up if it helps you understand the point I was trying to make.
********
Miss S,

I want to thank you for sharing with me last night. It means a lot to me.

Also, I wanted to continue that thing we were talking about, and maybe give you something to think about on your days off.

There�s a lot to the process of �seeing�. Some people start to see things right away, the rest of us have to work to understand what the whole thing is about, which is certainly why it�s called a journey. It can be very frustrating. For me, it is very frustrating that I don�t have the answers I want to have while I�m in the middle of a conversation with someone who very much wants to understand. Fortunately, I�m a fairly good writer.

I think what is very important for you to remember at these times that we talk is that I don�t have the answers. More specifically, I don�t have *your* answers. It�s the very clich� �I have not the answers you seek� type of thing. But I think I can help you sort through the information.

I think the most relevant thing on your mind is the �Don�t I have a right to be mad� thing. And I kept saying, �yeah, sure.� What I really meant was, you have the right to feel ANY way you want. That is your experience alone. All that you have to realize is that YOU are the one FEELING these ways. You can just as easily be the one NOT feeling these ways. (It�s very much a �my arm hurts when I do this� �so stop doing that� type of thing.)

So, why would you want to *not* feel this way? Like you said, it doesn�t seem right to not feel that way. However, as Dr. Phil would say, �How�s that working out for you so far?� (Yeah, I watch Dr. Phil, shut the fuck up.)

Anger and guilt are very much so addictions. Your entire ego is an addiction. It just so happens that your particular ego has some anger and guilt. My secret goal is for you to understand that the whole thing is an illusion. Every bit of it. Basically, it�s time for you to �get the joke.� It�s time for you to �step back� from (her full name was here).

If I asked you if you are the same person you were when you were three years old, you would most likely tell me �no, obviously not.� And that�s basically true, kinda. I mean, physically you�ve changed fairly dramatically, plus now you�ve been through years and years of school so that you have learned TONS of stuff PLUS you�ve been through years and years of life, stockpiling wisdom. So, yeah, �S� at (how old are you again?) twenty-something is a whole bunch different as �S� at age three. Your mother probably has wonderful stories. 

On the other hand, as you look back through your life, AREN�T you the VERY same as you were when you were three years old? Are you not the same curious spirit, the same watcher who has watched all these years? You are still that very essence. You will always be that essence.

What life has done, though, is it gave you a name. And you�ve spent a lot of time adding things to that name. (Full name) is beautiful with a wonderful sense of humour. (Full name) is very smart. (Full name) has a wonderful boyfriend. (Full name) has good relationships with her friends and family. (Full name) isn�t too terribly crazy. (Her full name) wants to help children. (Full name) likes pretty barrettes and earrings and purses.

But what would happen if you woke up tomorrow in an unfamiliar place and not a memory at all? Who would be there?

That�s YOU!!

Just because you wouldn�t be able to remember all the wonderful things, doesn�t mean you wouldn�t be there, yes? You just wouldn�t be (Full name).

Does this make sense to you?

Look and see not who but what �S� is.

As long as you keep looking to see what it is that you are, you will keep finding these wonderful things. For instance, when someone fucks up/with someone in �S��s family, she gets fucking Pissed. Off.

So, yeah, get pissed off, but SEE that you are getting pissed off. Watch the �S� flare ups. Enjoy the (Full name) show.

That�s all this is. It�s a game, it�s a show. We can manipulate it pretty much however we want. I enjoy the new age spiritual aspect of it because there are these amazing miracles that I hear and read about, and I personally enjoy that kind of shit. It doesn�t mean that �S� has to take the same path. **But what you should know is that whatever path you take is the right one.**

Word.
-CHris.

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