2005-07-28 ~ 3:49 p.m.

Chewie Is Good, Thanks For Your Concern

For those keeping score...

Chewie is fine. He made it out of surgery ok, but they won't let him come home for a few days. That's probably harder on me than it is for the dog. Hell, he's on some heavy medication, so I'm not sure he really cares where he is right now. They say that he won't come out of the cage unless bribed with food....that's my boy.

My car is still dented. It will continue to be that way for awhile as my dog's newly found drug habit has cleared me out for awhile. (I think the surgery has something to do with it too.)

It's monsoon season in Vegas. No, I'm serious. I know we were all whiny last week with 9 days of over 115 degrees, but seriously, hand to God, these months are our monsoon season. Yes, monsoon season visits the desert. The first major rain was the very same night my car got hit. My car wasn't the only car that got hit last night, but my accident was the least fatal of all of them. The streets in Vegas, from 3-7am, AYE EMM, were covered, COVERED in accidents. I know I repeated myself a lot in that sentence, but I can't express to you how retarded we get out here when rain hits.

And also a science lesson....
As you know, streets get covered in oil from cars passing each day. This oil builds up, especially in our usual dryness so that when it rains, the first couple of hours are so very dangerous while that oil slicks up before it washes away. We Vegans are too hopped up on the coke we've been snorting off of strippers' asses to notice, so danger emerges. So, if you decide to visit my beautiful city in the next few weeks, expect rain. Lots of it. And "snow" if that's what you're looking for.

I'm just kidding. I haven't snorted coke off of a stripper's ass in YEARS!

And, again, my favorite lesbian lawyer is here, and since today was the last of her bar exam, she hasn't eaten, and she's drinkin' on an empty stomache! YAAAAAAAAAAY!!

I don't snort coke off of her ass either.

...as many times as I ask..

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