2004-09-26 ~ 4:48 a.m.

Dealing And Robbery, Unrelated Stories

When you're losing at blackjack, don't up your bet. Just don't. It's retarded. And you'll lose. And if you don't lose, you'll get it in your head that you can lose and up your bet and win, and the next time you do it, when you have more on the line mostly likely, you'll lose. Then you'll get all uppity, and I really hate that. When you're losing, bet the minimum, when you're winning, THEN you up your bet. Period. Just do it that way, tip the dealer, and we'll all get along.

There was this guy, real sweet, he had bought in for $5000. He played anywhere from $100 to $300. If he lost a couple of hands, the dumbass would bet $500, or sometimes $1000. The thing is, he would win. THEN he wouldn't leave. People, LEAVE. And don't do this "Oh, I want to leave at a round number" shit. If you're up $499, the SECOND you say, "I want to leave with $500"... just leave then. You won't win it. You just won't. Don't argue with me. So, he starts to lose and after playing for FOUR hours, he decides to start playing $1000's. and, yes, he lost.

There was another guy, though, that bought in for $300, he lost it fairly quickly, he got up to leave and I said, "You have a Bud Light coming." So, he said, "Eh..." and then he bought in for another $200. I told him he didn't have to play more, he could just wait for his drink, but he said, "Doesn't matter, play here, play somewhere else..." Then he ended up staying with me until the end of my shift. He may still be there now. I would say he tipped me about $100, and we had played those, so I made $200 off of him. And he was up a few hundred. See? Dreams do come true!

Then there was this other piece of shit. I had come back from break and he was sitting there with the guy from the previous paragraph. And this jerk was middle-aged and foreign. He was one of these guys that calls girls over and says, "Bring me some luck." and you can tell how horrified these girls are to be talking to a guy like this, but always taught to be polite, they still talk to them. So, ladies, don't talk to these guys. They are NEVER interesting, it's not your mind they're looking for. Anyway, so this guy called one girl over, put up $50 for her to play. She lost it, so she left, and he said some crap like, "I don't even get a kiss for that?" So I had to "politely" remind him that he had asked her to come over there and that he had offered the money, and she kept saying no until he insisted more than once. To which he replied that he was just kidding. ha. ha... So then he leaned over to the guy of my above paragraph and said, "I bet we could go into Tabu and get some girls and take them back to my room and bang them.. ha ha... (high five)" and the other guy just smiled like guys do when another guy is being an ass. Then, stupid jerk started losing, so he said, "c'mon, (fuzzy)" to which I replied, "*I*'m not going to bang you." Then he lost all of his money... and life was good. It rarely works out that way. I often lose to mysoginistic guys that don't tip.

And, yeah, I know I seem obsessed with the tipping, but it's the only way that I pay for the stuff that lets me communicate with you people. So there...

In other news, my sister-in-law and her fiance were held up at gunpoint last night. They were coming home from going out to a movie. They were walking up to their apartment. I mean, they were ALMOST there. Another 60 seconds and they would have been safely(?) inside. The thing is, their apartment is in a good neighborhood, but it's in a good neigborhood in between Compton and Watts. They were thinking about moving to Pittsburgh before, but I think that idea has become quite concrete in the last 24 hours. Also, for the love of God, people, INSURE YOUR JEWELRY!!!! Less than a cup of coffee a day. Yeah, they got her engagement ring. Fortunately, they hadn't changed their addresses on their ID's, so the robber isn't positive where they live, which is always very good.

Leprechaun lesbian rally edition. :D

{ previous ~ next }